A Story To Tell

I have a story to tell.

But I do not have the time because unfortunately (very very unfortunately) my dad sprung a nasty surprise on us today. He called and said he'd be coming home tonight.

I know!

Shit always hits the fan by the truckloads.

He thought it was very cute to let us know at the darn last minute. We thought it was extremely evil and totally uncalled for.

You should've seen my mom's reaction. I reacted the worst, of course, and was so close to jumping out the window.

'NOT FAIR!' I bellowed. 'He JUST left! I waited nearly two months for him to go! He can't just come back in less than one!!' I couldn't accept it. That 2 months I waited for his ass to leave were HELL. And I'm not exaggerating. H.E.L.L.

I didn't have time to prepare for it mentally and sunk right into depression.

My mom offered a word or two of consolation and we all concluded that there's really nothing we could do other than to win the lottery and get the fuck out of this place.

With the recent (yes, again) demise of J in my life, I didn't need this bullpoop.

I haven't had the time to grieve over the loss of a long-term relationship. And now I'm trashed back into living hell.

Somehow, my life has a way of ripping itself right apart and flinging its pieces in each and every direction.

'If you don't like a system, get out of it' - words forever etched in my memory by a guy who used to be the bestest friend I ever had, although he disappeared on me one day like all good things do....I digressed.

So I have decided to get out of it. I am making plans to do something so absurd, it makes getting a tattoo look like playing with Barbie dolls.

Sure, it's a risky thing I'm gonna do but hey, I'm someone with absolutely nothing to lose.

I've lost all I could.

If I can't survive, I die.